So, this Tuesday we ended up in our Haninge flat after a 2 hour quick flight from Heathrow, London. Our week at the coast Goring-by-Sea with sister and husband, together with my lovely GF, became a week to miss. The meets with our old friends that turned up on different days was very nice and they looked after us wonderfully. The English pub meals were really tasty and the beer was tasty. Yes, beer! You see the Dr at the Huddinge centre popped in as I had given blood and told me and GF that I could fly and drink good old pub beer. It was wonderful to try this out since a long spell and a few days were good without a headache. If you wait too long without food it gives me a headache. If I take a pint it can give me a little sleep, which it did last Sunday. Oh Well!
So, talking about before the Goring-by Sea visit, we turned up at the Brain Cancer dept at Huddinge. I was now releases from the one month staying at the rehab place and getting used to the flat again. My 2nd son was there and things tried to revert in ordinary ways, with certain faults with his school visiting. I was now trying getting on with what was on for me and things took time but now, after the second run of 5th evening of taking 3x100 ml I was ready to have my hol. So, what’s up now? Well I suppose I’m going to have as ok as possible for the rest of my life, which is unknown really. Being run by the death bit is unknown and I need to have as good as I can. We will have to see what turns out in the near future.
Stephen
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Saturday, 16 October 2010
Sorrr.....
....if no showinw of cancer eaping out of the skull, no more cancer treatment for now until 9 Nov. Between then Goring-By-Sea will arrive. A part of agreeing with the nurses that 2 pints evening time will not do me harm. We will have to see.
Stephen
Stephen
Wednesday, 13 October 2010
What is it that actually functions around your own mind and body during the already known short life that awaits one at some time? What awaits you so you can possibly have a nice time with the life left, that one could deal with over a visiting period?
The knowledge that you will die earlier than the normal lucky lived, safe taken human, is a real shit. However, I am more aware that I will travel to my sister and her great husband, Alan, in England’s wonderful South Sea living town, Goring-by-Sea.
If things run during the second lot of cancer capsules around 20th Oct, maybe me and GF will have a chance to visit them until school goes back after half-time. It seems not exactly during the week of holiday for Mary as she has some work to do. No big problem as we can take it easy.
I will have to wait until app. 9th November to hear what the same day x-ray will show how much cancer I have. There might be a very weird reply that they cannot see the cancer but know, of course, its very small somewhere. Just now I feel run down with banged right knee/shins and also how I used to feel look after at Hästhagen. I can say that, again, the nurses and Drs were very close to me and very worth knowing.
I hope I will keep going for the time at see my family in England including my eldest sister, Tricia. Peter, my brother-in-law is still working at the school where they live in somewhere an hour from Alicante I think.
So that’s it for a while. See when I will write again.
Stephen
The knowledge that you will die earlier than the normal lucky lived, safe taken human, is a real shit. However, I am more aware that I will travel to my sister and her great husband, Alan, in England’s wonderful South Sea living town, Goring-by-Sea.
If things run during the second lot of cancer capsules around 20th Oct, maybe me and GF will have a chance to visit them until school goes back after half-time. It seems not exactly during the week of holiday for Mary as she has some work to do. No big problem as we can take it easy.
I will have to wait until app. 9th November to hear what the same day x-ray will show how much cancer I have. There might be a very weird reply that they cannot see the cancer but know, of course, its very small somewhere. Just now I feel run down with banged right knee/shins and also how I used to feel look after at Hästhagen. I can say that, again, the nurses and Drs were very close to me and very worth knowing.
I hope I will keep going for the time at see my family in England including my eldest sister, Tricia. Peter, my brother-in-law is still working at the school where they live in somewhere an hour from Alicante I think.
So that’s it for a while. See when I will write again.
Stephen
Tuesday, 12 October 2010
Last evening GF was tired at 21.00 and I wasn’t long after. I had a talk with my ex sister-in-law, who happened to ring suddenly before I went to bed.
I only had my duvet sheet on and felt blown, so I took the filler and lay it on the top.
This caused me to start moving around and not have a nice early morning at all. I became tired and after breakfast I had to doze before GF took me to the physio place at Handen hospital. After talking and trying to walk for 5 min as my right leg is not nice, I sort of sais to the nice trainer that I did not know what I wanted my life to be.
Working at your muscles and stuff seem to be things that over do what actually the thing to be taken seriously is. I kind of understand that my life could be pleasing if I could travel to my sisters and their husbands. Staying at Goring-by-Sea with them would be nice.
I don’t really know how my life will page out. Just now I’m fairly clear that the life expectancy is not known and my cancer level is not showing if one takes the x-ray done on the 11th Aug. As the fatal part is a certainly, the time it takes to do something could be one year or 6 months or 4 years.
What I really want is to knowing how much nice time I have of my life yet? I don’t want to keep going to cancer therapy, taking it to do things they say will keep my alive longer. What do they know?
I have a session of capsules over 5 days, maybe more, sometime around the 20th October. Will have to see what date it will be as it will fuck, up I guess, our holiday to my sis and hub which have the last week free in Oct. Also my bloody knee hurts like hell.
Stephen
I only had my duvet sheet on and felt blown, so I took the filler and lay it on the top.
This caused me to start moving around and not have a nice early morning at all. I became tired and after breakfast I had to doze before GF took me to the physio place at Handen hospital. After talking and trying to walk for 5 min as my right leg is not nice, I sort of sais to the nice trainer that I did not know what I wanted my life to be.
Working at your muscles and stuff seem to be things that over do what actually the thing to be taken seriously is. I kind of understand that my life could be pleasing if I could travel to my sisters and their husbands. Staying at Goring-by-Sea with them would be nice.
I don’t really know how my life will page out. Just now I’m fairly clear that the life expectancy is not known and my cancer level is not showing if one takes the x-ray done on the 11th Aug. As the fatal part is a certainly, the time it takes to do something could be one year or 6 months or 4 years.
What I really want is to knowing how much nice time I have of my life yet? I don’t want to keep going to cancer therapy, taking it to do things they say will keep my alive longer. What do they know?
I have a session of capsules over 5 days, maybe more, sometime around the 20th October. Will have to see what date it will be as it will fuck, up I guess, our holiday to my sis and hub which have the last week free in Oct. Also my bloody knee hurts like hell.
Stephen
Thursday, 7 October 2010
Life & Death
So, the 4 weeks or so at the very good physio therapy staying place at Hästhagen is over for me. I said goodbye to all those I felt near to as friend and nurse and doctor. The details of the tablets and stuff was made clear and GF and I left the place.
My death is not really clear as to when and how it will happen. About two weeks ago, on the Wednesday evening I took me first of five capsules containing 250 ml of cancer med. Interesting to know that they don't know the level of cancer I have. They need to run two lots of this, the next at the end of Oct. Each 5 capsules is counted as one run. So, after this one they will x-ray me and take blood probably. I will find out about the result. Maybe I'll throw the whole thing in the river and show a strange empty of things but still get the Dr saying there will still be cancer lurking about.
So, lets see what Stephen's result will give and hope he can hold off the crap so he can visit friends out of land and, hopefully together with GF, have a nice time.
A couple of beers in the evening can be on the order list. Life is short, so something can be order with the nice meal attached.
Until the next blog I bid adjour to all readers.
Stephen
My death is not really clear as to when and how it will happen. About two weeks ago, on the Wednesday evening I took me first of five capsules containing 250 ml of cancer med. Interesting to know that they don't know the level of cancer I have. They need to run two lots of this, the next at the end of Oct. Each 5 capsules is counted as one run. So, after this one they will x-ray me and take blood probably. I will find out about the result. Maybe I'll throw the whole thing in the river and show a strange empty of things but still get the Dr saying there will still be cancer lurking about.
So, lets see what Stephen's result will give and hope he can hold off the crap so he can visit friends out of land and, hopefully together with GF, have a nice time.
A couple of beers in the evening can be on the order list. Life is short, so something can be order with the nice meal attached.
Until the next blog I bid adjour to all readers.
Stephen
Sunday, 3 October 2010
T-Minus 3½ days
The 3rd of October is now 20.29 and its one of the latest times I’ve spent out of bed. GF, my wonderful living with girl, fetched me from the staying place at Hästhagen Friday afternoon. I was a nice time to get away and GF made some lovely un-hurting stomach that appeared from me 2 weeks ago.
My tablets have lowered so I no more have the injection jab in the stomach or pills mind-day. GF is very clever at being a nurse and could run the taking of the white/light brownish tabs plus the dissolved ones. I’ll have to learn this to put her free to go straight to bed after 07.00 end of the night ward station. She works very hard.
I will be leaving Hästhagen on Wednesday this week and getting my rehab together in Handen, where is near to my flat. It will take some time to get me weight and strength together as they should be.
My car use is out of the window as is my pedal bike unless an absolute hidden amazement does work to my eyes and rest of me.
Eyes are not together at certain levels of movement and still not visible on the right after keeping the eyes straight and moving the finger over the right half. The left side is ok but the left and right eyes cannot see right zone. Urghh!
So, now is the time to wait to the call from the cancer people and see if the x-ray will show what the result will be from the non-destructing thing. Yes, although 3cmx1.5cm was fully removed, the cancer Dr told us the remaining stuff will keep eating at me. Sounds like a wonderful thing. I have no idea how low the cancer and how longer it can be kept.
If it takes a year and nothing really happens, I thing I would rather go on a holiday, drinking beer and wine, eating good food and die in the end. What’s the worse? I could get these things I take and still get the Death! My life will not be left with years of tries and pass away without good things.
I hope I get to experience this without the result of flames showing the end of me…
My tablets have lowered so I no more have the injection jab in the stomach or pills mind-day. GF is very clever at being a nurse and could run the taking of the white/light brownish tabs plus the dissolved ones. I’ll have to learn this to put her free to go straight to bed after 07.00 end of the night ward station. She works very hard.
I will be leaving Hästhagen on Wednesday this week and getting my rehab together in Handen, where is near to my flat. It will take some time to get me weight and strength together as they should be.
My car use is out of the window as is my pedal bike unless an absolute hidden amazement does work to my eyes and rest of me.
Eyes are not together at certain levels of movement and still not visible on the right after keeping the eyes straight and moving the finger over the right half. The left side is ok but the left and right eyes cannot see right zone. Urghh!
So, now is the time to wait to the call from the cancer people and see if the x-ray will show what the result will be from the non-destructing thing. Yes, although 3cmx1.5cm was fully removed, the cancer Dr told us the remaining stuff will keep eating at me. Sounds like a wonderful thing. I have no idea how low the cancer and how longer it can be kept.
If it takes a year and nothing really happens, I thing I would rather go on a holiday, drinking beer and wine, eating good food and die in the end. What’s the worse? I could get these things I take and still get the Death! My life will not be left with years of tries and pass away without good things.
I hope I get to experience this without the result of flames showing the end of me…
At Stephens borrowed PC in Hästhage!
Sunday, 26 September 2010
Sorry about the "fuck" word
So here I am and trying to get together the things that are waiting to be known.
I made it from Karolinska after surprising the Dr. She thought it very good and I was sent to Hästhage training at Ersta. My eyes are still not so good and I do as much training as is handled. As I was very light (71.6), it took me no good working on my right leg the first time.
All the exercises were done kneeling. They are very good and I give as well as I can. However I couldn’t get the foot up right side. After 4 half hour visits for knee training I was able to pull my leg up from the right side without help and alternate with the other several times. At last, a success.
We continue with twisting of body, push ups, turning over and doing push ups of the back. These things.....
I cannot really write these things. They form a detail of things that should show the “I’m going to fight my battle at its highest. I’m not and my eyes do actually fill with water at times.
Waking on the 27th Aug made me aware that something had occurred and the subsequent of listening of what had occurred was quite astounding to know. I do not still have a memory yet of my life since the 3rd Aug.
Everything that had been discussed with the Operation technician was after that very first meeting on 3rd Aug gone. I have been told I was put on the op table the 11th Aug to work on my cancer at the front left side, in with my right side vision stuff. I was worked on for a longer time than that was originally planned, but taken off after many hours. The op had begun to give wakey-wakey and was aware, they say, of the waking.
Suddenly, on the 12 they found a problem with blood on the left side, under the worked on area. The 13th Aug it became critic and I slept (for me to remember) until the 27th Aug. It was then I began to call after me lovely GF, who had been in contact with Dr’s, nurses and my nearest from my old marriage and the ex-brother and sister-in-laws. They had all waited for death or speech or walk ends to my 2½ weeks light slumber. I had shown another deal to my self and caused another reaction.
I was very weak as 2½ weeks showed me that time had shrunk me. After 9 days I had stuff they were surprised over and they said it was time to move to Hästhage near Sickle, Nacka.
I moves there with ambulance taxi and got a bed in a room with three other patients. One of them, who was older and wheelchair ridden, coughed and snorted for at least 1½ weeks before we and Jerzy, called Jerry, got a new guy called Micke. Better threesome.
However it’s difficult to work every training session that is booked up. I worked at 71.6 and tried do as much as I could. Sometimes, when getting ready for sleep, my eyes gave up and I got great soothing and understand from Tune, one of my nurses and other was my women Dr, Lotta.
This is the fourth day after cancer tube tablet. I have one evening this Sunday tonight and then its 23 days before the next lot if it’s decided. I have cried a deal for myself and with my GF, who cries too.
My life seems to be totally out of synch with things that are not in my life. My eye sight has not gained that I wish for and I wish one day it will. I would love to drive again but it seems that the vision from the central to the right side is missing. To follow the stuff on the right I must move my whole head to see where I am looking. Even during normal day times I get tired and my focus loses it. Having great look ability is not ok just now and, sadly, another fuck for crying sometimes.
So now it’s 26th Sunday and time for lunch. It will be my first pause for 23 days after the last of the chemo plastic pill which gets swollen this evening at 21.00 after injections and tabs for epilepsy. I wonder why so much of it when I have never suffered from it before? Aha, they gave me the sodden thing for the first time ever.
At Stephens borrowed PC in Hästhage!
I made it from Karolinska after surprising the Dr. She thought it very good and I was sent to Hästhage training at Ersta. My eyes are still not so good and I do as much training as is handled. As I was very light (71.6), it took me no good working on my right leg the first time.
All the exercises were done kneeling. They are very good and I give as well as I can. However I couldn’t get the foot up right side. After 4 half hour visits for knee training I was able to pull my leg up from the right side without help and alternate with the other several times. At last, a success.
We continue with twisting of body, push ups, turning over and doing push ups of the back. These things.....
I cannot really write these things. They form a detail of things that should show the “I’m going to fight my battle at its highest. I’m not and my eyes do actually fill with water at times.
Waking on the 27th Aug made me aware that something had occurred and the subsequent of listening of what had occurred was quite astounding to know. I do not still have a memory yet of my life since the 3rd Aug.
Everything that had been discussed with the Operation technician was after that very first meeting on 3rd Aug gone. I have been told I was put on the op table the 11th Aug to work on my cancer at the front left side, in with my right side vision stuff. I was worked on for a longer time than that was originally planned, but taken off after many hours. The op had begun to give wakey-wakey and was aware, they say, of the waking.
Suddenly, on the 12 they found a problem with blood on the left side, under the worked on area. The 13th Aug it became critic and I slept (for me to remember) until the 27th Aug. It was then I began to call after me lovely GF, who had been in contact with Dr’s, nurses and my nearest from my old marriage and the ex-brother and sister-in-laws. They had all waited for death or speech or walk ends to my 2½ weeks light slumber. I had shown another deal to my self and caused another reaction.
I was very weak as 2½ weeks showed me that time had shrunk me. After 9 days I had stuff they were surprised over and they said it was time to move to Hästhage near Sickle, Nacka.
I moves there with ambulance taxi and got a bed in a room with three other patients. One of them, who was older and wheelchair ridden, coughed and snorted for at least 1½ weeks before we and Jerzy, called Jerry, got a new guy called Micke. Better threesome.
However it’s difficult to work every training session that is booked up. I worked at 71.6 and tried do as much as I could. Sometimes, when getting ready for sleep, my eyes gave up and I got great soothing and understand from Tune, one of my nurses and other was my women Dr, Lotta.
This is the fourth day after cancer tube tablet. I have one evening this Sunday tonight and then its 23 days before the next lot if it’s decided. I have cried a deal for myself and with my GF, who cries too.
My life seems to be totally out of synch with things that are not in my life. My eye sight has not gained that I wish for and I wish one day it will. I would love to drive again but it seems that the vision from the central to the right side is missing. To follow the stuff on the right I must move my whole head to see where I am looking. Even during normal day times I get tired and my focus loses it. Having great look ability is not ok just now and, sadly, another fuck for crying sometimes.
So now it’s 26th Sunday and time for lunch. It will be my first pause for 23 days after the last of the chemo plastic pill which gets swollen this evening at 21.00 after injections and tabs for epilepsy. I wonder why so much of it when I have never suffered from it before? Aha, they gave me the sodden thing for the first time ever.
At Stephens borrowed PC in Hästhage!
Friday, 17 September 2010
Busy day
Today I woke up at 7.30. I got up around 8.00 and suddenly forgot where my small key was. I had breakfast and went back to my bed. I began to think and found it coververed in my necessary bag with my razor. Now I'm going to get a Mini key holder and use that!
At 10.00 I did a good half hour with my model Philipinne butterfly. I have almost drawn the outcast and can then cut the mpdel. This butterfly I saw live in the Stockholm glass visiting Hage area. I bought the car mounting sticker in 1988 and have had the same mounter still after changing 4 cars. I will make the ceramic one when I can.
Second 1/2 hr was Qi Zong and lots of moving arms and legs. Good training.
Last was Volley Ball with six a side! I could stand yet again and try to use my right eye. Its hard when you cannot see without following the whole area.
Now my hours are over until coming Monday. I am going to be at Hästhage this weekend as GF has night work. She will be free on Sunday and follow me to Karolinska at 9 am. That info will come.
Stephen
At 10.00 I did a good half hour with my model Philipinne butterfly. I have almost drawn the outcast and can then cut the mpdel. This butterfly I saw live in the Stockholm glass visiting Hage area. I bought the car mounting sticker in 1988 and have had the same mounter still after changing 4 cars. I will make the ceramic one when I can.
Second 1/2 hr was Qi Zong and lots of moving arms and legs. Good training.
Last was Volley Ball with six a side! I could stand yet again and try to use my right eye. Its hard when you cannot see without following the whole area.
Now my hours are over until coming Monday. I am going to be at Hästhage this weekend as GF has night work. She will be free on Sunday and follow me to Karolinska at 9 am. That info will come.
Stephen
Thursday, 16 September 2010
So today....
....was one of those breakfasts which was ok followed half hour of the knee usage to train the usage. This was done by an expert girl who has the expertise we follow.
We use kneeling and backwards laying. After 1/2 hour I'm knackered and the second 1/2 hour is not fully ok. I do get time running by Karim, who shows me how to run 1 kilo. It was good. After lunch and rest I had coffee at 14.00 and my GF came. I was ready to do more training but my good friends
were there. We had a good timd, we four. They were here a long time. I knew more were coming so said bye, ate late and met then the Huddinge Motorcycle group. This was good to and explained how thigs happened.
I hope everyone had a good time.
All the best
Stephen
We use kneeling and backwards laying. After 1/2 hour I'm knackered and the second 1/2 hour is not fully ok. I do get time running by Karim, who shows me how to run 1 kilo. It was good. After lunch and rest I had coffee at 14.00 and my GF came. I was ready to do more training but my good friends
were there. We had a good timd, we four. They were here a long time. I knew more were coming so said bye, ate late and met then the Huddinge Motorcycle group. This was good to and explained how thigs happened.
I hope everyone had a good time.
All the best
Stephen
Wednesday, 15 September 2010
So, what happened?
Everyone knew i was going to have an op.it was the 11th Aug in the morning.
I was given the os, where they cut off the left part of the skull and removes the cancer (i think).
I was brought around but do not remember. After two days, 13 Aug my brain was bleeding and a new op had to be done. This time I was caused to stay asleep i two & half weeks.
Every friend did not know the out come of my life.
The 17th I managed to briefly show some life.
The 27th Aug I awoke and my life, weak as it was,said hi! I had both feet, hands, sight and touch. I managed to surprise the Drs and my lover together with fam friends and also close work colleagues. So, after nearly several weeks I am at Hästhage and train my poor,weak body. Give me power everone!
Stephen - 15th Sept 2010
I was given the os, where they cut off the left part of the skull and removes the cancer (i think).
I was brought around but do not remember. After two days, 13 Aug my brain was bleeding and a new op had to be done. This time I was caused to stay asleep i two & half weeks.
Every friend did not know the out come of my life.
The 17th I managed to briefly show some life.
The 27th Aug I awoke and my life, weak as it was,said hi! I had both feet, hands, sight and touch. I managed to surprise the Drs and my lover together with fam friends and also close work colleagues. So, after nearly several weeks I am at Hästhage and train my poor,weak body. Give me power everone!
Stephen - 15th Sept 2010
Wednesday, 11 August 2010
Monday 11th Aug 2010 06:40
In one hour they fetch me and take me to the op rum. My iphone and other stuff will be moved to locked room somewhere and i will vacate my nice single room here on floor 6, dept r16, room 3. I have showered with special anti-bacterial soap and am lying on my newly bedded bed. In one hour approx they will roll me down to the op room and, as always have me count to 5 knowing i will reach 2, maybe. I've been knocked twice before during my life.
At 12 years old the knew i had an undescended right testicle and the school Dr thought it was time to do the right thing and remove the thing from the channel on the right side where it was stuck. The took it out, cut open my right side of the scrotum and pop it in. They sewed it up and i had stitches in both places. Of cofse i didnt know when i work up that i have stiches in my balls and thought i had just loose skjn. When i lifted my bed clothes and saw the stiches in my scrotum i got a shock. What followed was a complcation that cauSed a blooded clot on the wound and i had to spend an extra week in host and squeeze out the blood in 3 sali ne baths a day. I was in Croydon General hospital for two weeks instead of one sods of law.
Now i have taken a sedative and in 20 mins i will bexrolled down to the theater for my new acting part. I wil be trusting the surgeons to not take away my entire right vision as i can live as it is now. So the nurses now want my iphone to be locked away.
So this is my last entry for a awhile and, the the higher things around us might let me survive with vision intact as the are now instead of loosins my right vision. Keep though thumbs crossed.
Stephenx
At 12 years old the knew i had an undescended right testicle and the school Dr thought it was time to do the right thing and remove the thing from the channel on the right side where it was stuck. The took it out, cut open my right side of the scrotum and pop it in. They sewed it up and i had stitches in both places. Of cofse i didnt know when i work up that i have stiches in my balls and thought i had just loose skjn. When i lifted my bed clothes and saw the stiches in my scrotum i got a shock. What followed was a complcation that cauSed a blooded clot on the wound and i had to spend an extra week in host and squeeze out the blood in 3 sali ne baths a day. I was in Croydon General hospital for two weeks instead of one sods of law.
Now i have taken a sedative and in 20 mins i will bexrolled down to the theater for my new acting part. I wil be trusting the surgeons to not take away my entire right vision as i can live as it is now. So the nurses now want my iphone to be locked away.
So this is my last entry for a awhile and, the the higher things around us might let me survive with vision intact as the are now instead of loosins my right vision. Keep though thumbs crossed.
Stephenx
Tuesday, 10 August 2010
Just as I thought
Had a long visit from four of my work mates (section chief included). We had a good talk and they stayed 1,5 hours at least. Then GF came and dinner was served. As i finished the nice surgeon arrived and told me there was no other tumour showing on the mri. However the now known as primary tumour had grown since 28th july 2x 1,5 to 3,5 x 1,5. This shows its more than likely cancer and the op will be at 8am tomorrow, Wednesday. Hopefully my sight will not be made any diff than now but i cannot bank on it.
This was heard also by my ex who turned up. When the doc had gone, my ex bro & sis inlaw arrived so we were a quite a bunch in the visiting room.
Now they have all gone and im on 16 cortizon tabs, plus epelepsy, stomach and simvastitin. I will have an injection in my stomach to ward off infections tonight and at 6am tomorrow. I will shower with anti-infection soon and again tomorrow. No food from midnight.
After the op it will take at least 5 days to say the cancer type and then decide the course of treatment. Whatever it will be will be tough. Gosh what curved balls are being thrown my way!
This was heard also by my ex who turned up. When the doc had gone, my ex bro & sis inlaw arrived so we were a quite a bunch in the visiting room.
Now they have all gone and im on 16 cortizon tabs, plus epelepsy, stomach and simvastitin. I will have an injection in my stomach to ward off infections tonight and at 6am tomorrow. I will shower with anti-infection soon and again tomorrow. No food from midnight.
After the op it will take at least 5 days to say the cancer type and then decide the course of treatment. Whatever it will be will be tough. Gosh what curved balls are being thrown my way!
My new place
Now i am at my new living quarters. I have got my own room on floor 6, dept R16, room 3. Here i will be until tomorrow morning, when they give me sedatives and wheel me down to the OR and knock me out for 3 hours. They told me i will woken up straight after surgery as this is the best for my brain so no long time stuff. I will know whats what when i actually become compus mentus. I will be held in a recovery room for a while until moving to my real room on ward R13,not R16 and probably not my own room :o( . Hohum. I probably wont care.
Had my MRI at 11:30. It was a complimentary one, lasting 20 mins. I should get some answer from the brain surgeon who will be visiting me this afternoon. Maybe they've found the culprit causing this one. I've got a headache and i wonder if its the stress or the ruddy tumour. Oops..now its time for ECG.
Had my MRI at 11:30. It was a complimentary one, lasting 20 mins. I should get some answer from the brain surgeon who will be visiting me this afternoon. Maybe they've found the culprit causing this one. I've got a headache and i wonder if its the stress or the ruddy tumour. Oops..now its time for ECG.
Monday, 9 August 2010
Today I woke at 9:30, had cereal for breckie and took the bus to the data centre. There, I went to the colocation and looked for my keys to the room in the cellar. There is my Alt Saxophone and music/stands. Couldn't find them. Went down to level two and found my old friends from the site engineering dept and one of my work mates. They said they would open the door for me. My work colleague and me went to lunch and had a good talk. Once back we took down the power for WoW, which is now almost silent. The lights are turned off.
Then me and work friend went to Colo, where i should him how to fix new people in the key system.
The phone rang and it was my neuro surgeon. We had a long talk about the ways and wherefores and she was very good at explaining. Basically they think i have cancer and somewhere a primary one, hidden. I asked if, finding another that was easier to reach, they might be able to get to that and check whats what and she said yes. The MRI tomorrow might find the primary growth. They will also see if the one they see has grown since being found 2 weeks ago. So I guess things wll be known.
Colleague and me went down to the cellar and I pulled out the Sax from its lovely case. I gave it a blow and it felt good, even though ive lost most of the knack. Packed everything up and GF met me at the entrance. First time the Sax has been home for 5 years.
So, a little of Whisky with cola has been drunk after dinner. The first whisky and coke though got spilled all over my litte Samsung Laptop and it basically f****d. So, if I get through this thing with everthing in working order I will buy a new one.
Its 21:38. Time to pack a few things maybe.
I will be admitted to R13 at Karolinska Universitetssjukhuset at 10:00. Visiting hours from 14:00 to 19:00.
Welcome all who wsh to say something.
Stephen
Then me and work friend went to Colo, where i should him how to fix new people in the key system.
The phone rang and it was my neuro surgeon. We had a long talk about the ways and wherefores and she was very good at explaining. Basically they think i have cancer and somewhere a primary one, hidden. I asked if, finding another that was easier to reach, they might be able to get to that and check whats what and she said yes. The MRI tomorrow might find the primary growth. They will also see if the one they see has grown since being found 2 weeks ago. So I guess things wll be known.
Colleague and me went down to the cellar and I pulled out the Sax from its lovely case. I gave it a blow and it felt good, even though ive lost most of the knack. Packed everything up and GF met me at the entrance. First time the Sax has been home for 5 years.
So, a little of Whisky with cola has been drunk after dinner. The first whisky and coke though got spilled all over my litte Samsung Laptop and it basically f****d. So, if I get through this thing with everthing in working order I will buy a new one.
Its 21:38. Time to pack a few things maybe.
I will be admitted to R13 at Karolinska Universitetssjukhuset at 10:00. Visiting hours from 14:00 to 19:00.
Welcome all who wsh to say something.
Stephen
Friday, 6 August 2010
6th Aug 2010 18:12
Spoke to the nurse at Karolinska this afternoon. She is going to get the neuro surgeon we met last tues to ring me on monday. If i want a second opinion i will have to go to Uppsala. I want to know how many have really checked out my pics and if there is another way of handling this. I wont just nod and accept the first thing that is said.
6th Aug 2010 15:14
Just thought.......
Cant i be out somewhere and see some youngster in a perilous predicament and save him/her with a cost....? :o) That would be OK!
Cant i be out somewhere and see some youngster in a perilous predicament and save him/her with a cost....? :o) That would be OK!
6th Aug 2010 12:55
Lay awake last night with thoughts poring through my head. Finally rang the GF, who was working nights at the elderly home she is a nurse at.
I suddenly wondered why they should cut me up JUST to see what the tumour is about and at the same time muck up the functioning part of me. OK, I cant see the right side at the top to middle and have to move my entire face to read the text. At least at distance i can see most things without feeling so disturbed. They only want to see if its cancer or not and the mri on tuesday will check if i have a queen tumour in the head. If there is maybe its easier getable at and they can check that. Then they can put in treatment for the nasty one, too.
I think probing in my head for "checking" is a bit over the top and will not sign any ops papers until i have second or even third opinions. Can a laser sword or chemo do the trick without interference with the brain tissue? Would be a bonus.
I suddenly wondered why they should cut me up JUST to see what the tumour is about and at the same time muck up the functioning part of me. OK, I cant see the right side at the top to middle and have to move my entire face to read the text. At least at distance i can see most things without feeling so disturbed. They only want to see if its cancer or not and the mri on tuesday will check if i have a queen tumour in the head. If there is maybe its easier getable at and they can check that. Then they can put in treatment for the nasty one, too.
I think probing in my head for "checking" is a bit over the top and will not sign any ops papers until i have second or even third opinions. Can a laser sword or chemo do the trick without interference with the brain tissue? Would be a bonus.
Thursday, 5 August 2010
5th Aug 2010 19:23
This morning, around lunch time, I walked off to the center. My GF had some stuff to do so I had to fend for myself. I had received papers from the bank that i could sign and give power of attorney to my ex bro/sis-in-law to take care of my finacial matters if things go haywire. That feels reassuring. They do not have to do things together but act individually if need be. They are totally trustworthy.
While i was at the bank the GF rang and was at the center, too, so we had lunch together. We then walked up to O'Leary's and I had a beer while we sat outside on the pubs outside serving. The weather has been very warm and sunny. The beer didn't taste special because the tabs muck up my taste a lot, but beggars cant be chosers.
Then some friends rang me, Lasse and Mila, and they came over with some coffee bread in the guise of Cadbury's Chocolate Fingers. Now I have three boxes in the fridge. Nice sucking biccies. I need some crap in me as i weighed 73,6 kilos yesterday morning. Today i was at 75,7. What will it be tomorrow?
GF is working night today, from 21:00-07:00 and will be back here in time to give me my meds in the wee hours! :o) Son Nr 2 is still here, which is very nice.
I've been to the Library and borrowed 7 books on CD's. Busy loading the first 8 cd's upto my ITunes so i can listen to John Updikes "Villages" tonight. The other books are also loads of cd's, so it will keep me busy.
While i was at the bank the GF rang and was at the center, too, so we had lunch together. We then walked up to O'Leary's and I had a beer while we sat outside on the pubs outside serving. The weather has been very warm and sunny. The beer didn't taste special because the tabs muck up my taste a lot, but beggars cant be chosers.
Then some friends rang me, Lasse and Mila, and they came over with some coffee bread in the guise of Cadbury's Chocolate Fingers. Now I have three boxes in the fridge. Nice sucking biccies. I need some crap in me as i weighed 73,6 kilos yesterday morning. Today i was at 75,7. What will it be tomorrow?
GF is working night today, from 21:00-07:00 and will be back here in time to give me my meds in the wee hours! :o) Son Nr 2 is still here, which is very nice.
I've been to the Library and borrowed 7 books on CD's. Busy loading the first 8 cd's upto my ITunes so i can listen to John Updikes "Villages" tonight. The other books are also loads of cd's, so it will keep me busy.
Wednesday, 4 August 2010
4th Aug 2010 21:47
I think its time to explain the sight problem, as most think that I will lose the sight from one eye. This is not the case. They say I will lose the right side of my vision on BOTH eyes. To imagine this one can hold up a book or hands and block the sight over the entire right sides of left and right eye so u can only see half of the eyes vision. Having just one eye working fine is no big deal, but this is not going to be so fun. But I suppose its better than total blindness, which the surgeon says is not on the cards.
4th Aug 2010 19:02
Had a visit from the ex sister & bro-in-law this afternoon, while GF was away fixing personal stuff. They arrived around 14:30 with blueberry pie and cream and made some of the GF's Ethiopian coffee (the only coffee she drinks as she comes from there and that is actually where all coffee in the whole world originates from) and we sat and talked. They told me about how ex sis-in-laws mother found a lot of stuff in her body early last year and how she had written, a long time ago, a testament about how to do the right thing if things ever happen to the body that are irreversible. She passed away late last yeat and the document was known of by the hospital staff. Its not juristic but its signed by two witnesses and states that if things go wrong they can shutdown the life support.
Its in Swedish, but thats were I live, so I have printed it out and will get my ex sis-bro-in-laws to sign it!
Well, what a nice surprise. Nr 2 son has come home and we have had a long and, sometimes, emotional talk. He is very intellectual and understands the things that are happening. This is a good sign. Now its time for some scrambled eggs ala Stephen.
Its in Swedish, but thats were I live, so I have printed it out and will get my ex sis-bro-in-laws to sign it!
Well, what a nice surprise. Nr 2 son has come home and we have had a long and, sometimes, emotional talk. He is very intellectual and understands the things that are happening. This is a good sign. Now its time for some scrambled eggs ala Stephen.
4th Aug 00:16
Took a sleeping pill, which doesn't do a shit for a while.
Writing on my iphone 3GS, which takes time but is easier to see the text. GF is falling asleep beside me due to exhaustion in listening to me. Dont blame her.
As for oblivion, I know what its like when i crashed my pedal bike and lost consciosness for 20 min. I forgot the first 10 mins from my journey from home to the crash spot. Some punks had loosened my front wheel nuts and the wheel fell off. My helmet saved my death, which was a real thump on the temple of my left head So, i know oblivion and it could be a good way to solve this "lying as a slice of bacon" for evermore?
Wonder if i have the guts? Would be nice to be remembered by Blizz as a second to none support guy, immortality!
Tablet starting to work. Best not write masses of blurd shit i guess
Writing on my iphone 3GS, which takes time but is easier to see the text. GF is falling asleep beside me due to exhaustion in listening to me. Dont blame her.
As for oblivion, I know what its like when i crashed my pedal bike and lost consciosness for 20 min. I forgot the first 10 mins from my journey from home to the crash spot. Some punks had loosened my front wheel nuts and the wheel fell off. My helmet saved my death, which was a real thump on the temple of my left head So, i know oblivion and it could be a good way to solve this "lying as a slice of bacon" for evermore?
Wonder if i have the guts? Would be nice to be remembered by Blizz as a second to none support guy, immortality!
Tablet starting to work. Best not write masses of blurd shit i guess
Tuesday, 3 August 2010
3rd Aug 2010 19:00
The Ruddles County beer is being drunk from my pint mug and Fish & Chips is being made (the easy way in the oven) for GF and myself. Haricot beans and brussel sprouts plus som baked beans with make it tasty.
So to more matters, that, unfortnately, do not sound as nice as dinner.
The surgeon told me that the tumour is probably malignant and they cannot rule out a secondary one lying very, very hidden in my brain.
The position of the thing at the moment is very much within my vision area and not an easy thing to work on. The thing is that my sight is being effected by the growth and in all probabilty will, after the investigation surgery, result in my entire right side of both eyes sight disappearing.
As it is also near other stuff it could effect my speech and other things, which is a bummer.
So now I can say that I am no longer a driver unless a miracle happens and i come out unscatherd. My GF will have to take over my Cooper and become my chauffeur.
Next Tuesday, 10th Aug, I'm checking intó the Karolinska Neuro Host and having another MRI to find the possible "other culprit". Then the day after they are going to put me out for 3 + hours and cut a part of my skull away from the left side of my head, by the ear, and, using micro instruments, go through blood capilaries to take a biopsi of the tumour. This could cause the stuff already mentioned but i guess i'll just have to hope they are top notch and dont do anything.
After they know then the treatment can be decided. They dont really know if the op will happen next
Wed if there are more pressing things occuring for others.
They rang me up later and told me that i have now been given tablets for Epilepsy, which could happen. Nowadays prescriptions are sent electronically to the central Chemists base and you can get them from the nearesr chemist. So its one in the morning and evening.
So, I have a week of doing what i want and then who knows what my life will be like after the surgeory. One thing is clear is that work is not on the cards for an undetermined time.....so im busy deleting lots of phone nrs on my iphone...time for a shake down anyway.
Until next post....
Stephen
So to more matters, that, unfortnately, do not sound as nice as dinner.
The surgeon told me that the tumour is probably malignant and they cannot rule out a secondary one lying very, very hidden in my brain.
The position of the thing at the moment is very much within my vision area and not an easy thing to work on. The thing is that my sight is being effected by the growth and in all probabilty will, after the investigation surgery, result in my entire right side of both eyes sight disappearing.
As it is also near other stuff it could effect my speech and other things, which is a bummer.
So now I can say that I am no longer a driver unless a miracle happens and i come out unscatherd. My GF will have to take over my Cooper and become my chauffeur.
Next Tuesday, 10th Aug, I'm checking intó the Karolinska Neuro Host and having another MRI to find the possible "other culprit". Then the day after they are going to put me out for 3 + hours and cut a part of my skull away from the left side of my head, by the ear, and, using micro instruments, go through blood capilaries to take a biopsi of the tumour. This could cause the stuff already mentioned but i guess i'll just have to hope they are top notch and dont do anything.
After they know then the treatment can be decided. They dont really know if the op will happen next
Wed if there are more pressing things occuring for others.
They rang me up later and told me that i have now been given tablets for Epilepsy, which could happen. Nowadays prescriptions are sent electronically to the central Chemists base and you can get them from the nearesr chemist. So its one in the morning and evening.
So, I have a week of doing what i want and then who knows what my life will be like after the surgeory. One thing is clear is that work is not on the cards for an undetermined time.....so im busy deleting lots of phone nrs on my iphone...time for a shake down anyway.
Until next post....
Stephen
Monday, 2 August 2010
2nd Aug 2010 17:00
Had a nice lunch with some work friends but had to tell all, of course. This blog is one thing but from the horses mouth is deemed best i suppose. I poured down and GF came to pick me up in the Cooper. She is getting more used to it now.
I'm very tired but cannot shutdown at all and GF thought i was sleeping when she went off to get her car from the garage. My older sister rang from her and hubbies home in Javea in Spain. They have a small but nice flat there at a friends house, occupying the lower level. As we were talking my mobile rang and it was the Neurological Centre at Karolinska, Solna, where I will be meeting surgeon Dr Jennie Pettersson-Segerlind at 14:00. I have nothing to say and will let them do all the talking. I'll sign on the dotted line, wherever they want. There isn't much to be discussed.
Tonight I will take a sleeping pill.
I'm very tired but cannot shutdown at all and GF thought i was sleeping when she went off to get her car from the garage. My older sister rang from her and hubbies home in Javea in Spain. They have a small but nice flat there at a friends house, occupying the lower level. As we were talking my mobile rang and it was the Neurological Centre at Karolinska, Solna, where I will be meeting surgeon Dr Jennie Pettersson-Segerlind at 14:00. I have nothing to say and will let them do all the talking. I'll sign on the dotted line, wherever they want. There isn't much to be discussed.
Tonight I will take a sleeping pill.
2nd Aug 2010 09:50
Actually made the effort to sleep without a pill last night......
At 2 am i gave up and was up until 6 am. Have dozed an hour or so because of those ruddy cortizon tabs. Have taken next lot, too, so I'm going to be high again....and I cant see any real difference to the eyes yet. Very frustrating when i really want to go for a drive.
"Dream" some very strange things and not altogether nice stuff either. Hope they get on with me soon so i can get on with whatever is left of my life......im not putting any eggs in any baskets yet. Not that ive got any..cupboard is bare..have to do some shopping.
I have a lovely Yamaha Alt sax, which I havent blown for years. Its down in the cellar at work where i could blow it without disturbing all the flat tenants. I'll have to take some time and do that now, while im waiting. Might do me some good. Will have to take the bus to work in Farstato get my card, though, and a few other things prolly.
At 2 am i gave up and was up until 6 am. Have dozed an hour or so because of those ruddy cortizon tabs. Have taken next lot, too, so I'm going to be high again....and I cant see any real difference to the eyes yet. Very frustrating when i really want to go for a drive.
"Dream" some very strange things and not altogether nice stuff either. Hope they get on with me soon so i can get on with whatever is left of my life......im not putting any eggs in any baskets yet. Not that ive got any..cupboard is bare..have to do some shopping.
I have a lovely Yamaha Alt sax, which I havent blown for years. Its down in the cellar at work where i could blow it without disturbing all the flat tenants. I'll have to take some time and do that now, while im waiting. Might do me some good. Will have to take the bus to work in Farstato get my card, though, and a few other things prolly.
Sunday, 1 August 2010
1st Aug 2010 09:55
After paying 120 kr for my pics I have finally got them copied through good old print screen and paste on XP! Wow! So i have taken a few from 26th July (day one), MRI from 28th (day 2) and the last one showing my lower body. How many more i will have i dont know as yet.
Saturday, 31 July 2010
31st July 2010 23:04
Was out on Stockholm today with the GF and sat at a pub on Hornsgatan. Met a very nice couple who told us about their travels around the world and in particular to the Carribean on a three week holiday on a huge English cruise ship, Ventura. It sounded fantastic. Naturally the garden party my friend told me about was on the 22 Aug and not today so it didn't matter we were late to town. My ruddy eyes still play havoc with my sight though and typing is not as easy as it used to be, with lots of deleting and retyping. Hohum!
Today I should have been nicely on board the boat from Göteborg heading for Tilbury and my sister and bro in law.
Today I should have been nicely on board the boat from Göteborg heading for Tilbury and my sister and bro in law.
Friday, 30 July 2010
30th July 2010 20:30
Time for another 12 cortizon tablets. Tomorrow 10 morn and even, day after 8 x 2 and so on. Hope this will make the vision good but im not betting my hedges.
GF brought me home at 4pm and on the way i went to pick up my new glasses. I put them on and couldn't really see any diff and told the man behind the counter that i had had my eyes checked, as i had actually said to them i would do. He was very kind and, due to the situation, he refunded me the money and kept the 2400 kr glasses. I'll have to check them again when the crap is over.
GF brought me home at 4pm and on the way i went to pick up my new glasses. I put them on and couldn't really see any diff and told the man behind the counter that i had had my eyes checked, as i had actually said to them i would do. He was very kind and, due to the situation, he refunded me the money and kept the 2400 kr glasses. I'll have to check them again when the crap is over.
Friday 30th July 2010 11:00
Have just been visited by the neurolog and a dr. The Neuro man confirms that the pictures are not very clear as to the type of cell it is and they are going to have to go in to my head. I will be seeing some surgeons next week probably and it could take over two weeks before anything happens. So I am sitting here on my bed at Söder Hospital, waiting to get medicine to take home and some prescriptions. I will be checking out and eventually checking in at Karolinska Neurological Clinic in Solna, Stockholm when its time for the "drilling" Needless to say, this fills me with a certain amount of anxiety but everyone says they are extremely clever and its nothing to worry about..really. But its my bloody head and i dont want to lose my speech, sight etc etc. I miss my Mini Cooper and the though of never being able to drive again is not nice. After all, I've been on the road since 1971.
Anyway, they have said I can drink beer and have a bar-b-q and do as normal, despite the cortison treatment. So tomorrow afternoon I'm going to an English Garden Party with my GF after being told about it by my English friend, Sandra.
I only hope the cortison take the water from the tumour so my eyes work again and I dont lose my license.
Anyway, they have said I can drink beer and have a bar-b-q and do as normal, despite the cortison treatment. So tomorrow afternoon I'm going to an English Garden Party with my GF after being told about it by my English friend, Sandra.
I only hope the cortison take the water from the tumour so my eyes work again and I dont lose my license.
Sometimes you have one thrown your way without knowing!
Monday 26th July
What happened?… and is happening!
Here I am going to try to write the things that led to my present status. If the text is strange then its due to the thing that brought about the actual fault in me.
Well, I am a guy who has being working with computer stuff for many years and have helped customers with their equipment based in our co-location site. One of these is actually Blizzard Entertainment and they have become close friends of mine.
I had booked my holiday to the UK, driving my fantastic Mini Cooper S 2007 via Gotherburg to Tilbury and, later in Sept, a trip to stay with my Blizz friend for 3 weeks in LA.
Last week I found that I was having a teeny bit of eye sight problem and, naturally, thought I neede a new check after two and half years. I did need new glasses but this was not helping the fault i had as they cannot see this in their instruments. I spoke to my lovely GF, who is a nurse, and she told me to go to the eye emergency dept.
I let the weekend go and went for a walk and, while sitting down by Rudans Gård, here in Handen….I started to check on my sight.
I put my arms out, stretched to either side and checked if i could see my fingers wiggling. Left lower and upper ok, right lower ok but upper was a no no. I moved my hands nearer to my nose and the thing appeared in the centre. I had been having difficulty seeing text on the right side a bit during the beginning of last week but not so extreme. I went to the optician last thurs and my reading was ok and i needed new glasses after two and half years anyway. The other stuff she couldn’t check.
So, I spoke to my nurse girlfriend and she said I should contact eye emergency at St Eriks Hostpital in Stockholm. At 23:00 they told me to ring to Söder Hospital which is my local emergency. So, I drove my Cooper to work in Farsta quite early and ran off to the bus for the centrum where i then got the tube to skanstull. I was admitted to the eye dept and was seen quite quickly.
26th July 2010 08:30
A nurse took me for a quick check of my eye pressures which were ok. I touched my nose from each side…ok…eyes closed…ok….move them around..ok. Then i told her the problem and she said the dr would check more.
After the dr had looked with blinding light at me she sent me for a new check where i would look with each eye individually. They gave me a button to press when i could see the small flashes that popped up on the screen. After that was done, and me knowing i had missed everyone in the upper right region she looked in my eyes again with special drops so she could see further back.
She looked at me and said that she suspected i had had a mild stroke by my optical nerve system that transports the light to the back of the head. She gave me a admittance paper to the medical emergency dept and off i went, outside the building, to enter the emergency dept and queue again.
It went quite quicklly and i saw a dr who told me, while drawing my eyes on the paper lining the bed i was sitting on that it could be a vessel that has burst or it could be a tumour under the “roundabout” that eye channels take to the back of the brain. He didn’t think so in this case but i would now have a brain xray inclu taking a contrast injection for the last part of the x-ray.
When done the dr called me back and told me that i had a primary brain tumour at the side of my eye central and it was the water on the tumour that was causing the upper right side sight problem, which is effecting both eyes if i haven’t said before.
So, with that bomdshell, I rang my GF and she came very quickly and they moved me up to the ward for further treatment. I had known from the eye dr that i was now banned from driving for at least 1½ months and she would be kind and not report this yet to the auth so my license would not be taken. Now i have to take cortison, 18 dissolve tabs twice a day, reduces every two days by two tabs for at least 2 weeks, to take away the water so my eyesight returns again. My GF drove my loving Cooper home without any hassle and parked it in the underground carpark by my flat, locked away. Now i know im going to have an MRI on wednesday.
27th July 2010 13:00
Today they have taken my blood to test for cholesterol and it looks not bad considering i had stopped taking my simvastatin while slimming. Now im back on it for my normal cholesterol which is at 8,5 but the nasty one, triglycerides, is at 1,5 which is great! Slimming and not eating masses of crap is good. I wnt down from 82,7 kilos to 76. During the afternoon my GF was here and my ex and my 3 boys, 15, 16, he is now 17 as from 28th July, and my oldest, 21.
28th July 2010 09:00
Taken downstairs for my MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging ), which took 45 mins of laying as still as a rock. They also shot contour liquid into me again (my poor kidneys)
Just while i was going to eat my lunch i got a visit from two drs, one a neuro dr who told me they couldn’t say the tumour was primary until they had checked the rest of my body for stuff. This i had heard from the mri tech who was going to rebook the xray from today, 29th, until tomorrow. This was to spare my kidney and liver i think. The nero dr did not call the tumour for tumour…he called it cell change. And to make things a bit more shaky he said that, lthough they can see from photos to a fantastic degree if things re malignant or benign they will probably have to go in anyway. The bloody thing is at the front of the brain, to the left and they have to go a long way in. That does not feel so good actually. Ho Hum!
The day went by and then i got the news i could go home on leave for a night. Then they came back and said my x-ray would be on the 29th anyway as my kidney and liver were very good and i was healthy otherwise. So GF took me home and we could spend the evening and night together, cuddling. I hade all my tablets with me and took my sleepimg one as usual as the cortison speeds you up.
29th July 2010 08:00
I had to be back on the ward by 08:30 to take my special drink of almost one litre before being taken down, again, to the same machine as on monday. Here i was injected again with contrast fluid and they took photos of my lower region for 10 mins. Now I have to drink a lot of fluid to help my kidneys.
I’ve just eaten fish soup and pancakes and strawberry jam for lunch…..and lots of water. Now im waiting for my ex wife-in-law to come and see me with some good cd books that i can load upto my iphone and rest my eyes and lsiten to stories.
The Neuro team at Karolinska meet today to look at everyones pics. They will decide what is what and i’ll maybe get to know the score today. Then i’ll probably have to move to Karolinska Institute at Solna, just in the north part of Stockholm.
29nd 13:25
Just a bit more. Nothing wrong with my lower parts. Will probably get leave from tomorrow. The Neuro team have lots of patients to check so i might not be among them today, so next meet is on Monday. HoHum! Have spent the evening loading up lots of Hasse & Tagge cd's to my IPHONE, so now I can botanise in the vast selection of comedy from these two classic Swedish comedians and they troup of members on stage. Have also looked at an episode of The Sweeney, one from the entire collection I bought from HMV online. Have also got Kungfu with me too, if I have the effort to watch.
30th July 2010 05:28
Despite a sleeping pill, which knocked me, I woke up to the patient opposite me nose sniffing and the nurse visiting the one in the outer corner of my four bed room. So up I got, had a fresh shower, weighed myself (75,5 kilos) and am trying to open up the CD with all my x-ray pictures, which cost 120 kr. Of course you see on the cover that its not supported for Windows 7, only NT4, 2000 Prof or XP! So I’ll have to wait until later on if they let me go home for the weekend. My home made power pc has good ‘ol XP Prof that works better than W7. Sodding version!!!
Oh, thank goodness they've turned off the room alert alarms! They seem to be oblivious of them when they work nights here. Very disturbing for your sleep. Now I've been awake since 4 am
What happened?… and is happening!
Here I am going to try to write the things that led to my present status. If the text is strange then its due to the thing that brought about the actual fault in me.
Well, I am a guy who has being working with computer stuff for many years and have helped customers with their equipment based in our co-location site. One of these is actually Blizzard Entertainment and they have become close friends of mine.
I had booked my holiday to the UK, driving my fantastic Mini Cooper S 2007 via Gotherburg to Tilbury and, later in Sept, a trip to stay with my Blizz friend for 3 weeks in LA.
Last week I found that I was having a teeny bit of eye sight problem and, naturally, thought I neede a new check after two and half years. I did need new glasses but this was not helping the fault i had as they cannot see this in their instruments. I spoke to my lovely GF, who is a nurse, and she told me to go to the eye emergency dept.
I let the weekend go and went for a walk and, while sitting down by Rudans Gård, here in Handen….I started to check on my sight.
I put my arms out, stretched to either side and checked if i could see my fingers wiggling. Left lower and upper ok, right lower ok but upper was a no no. I moved my hands nearer to my nose and the thing appeared in the centre. I had been having difficulty seeing text on the right side a bit during the beginning of last week but not so extreme. I went to the optician last thurs and my reading was ok and i needed new glasses after two and half years anyway. The other stuff she couldn’t check.
So, I spoke to my nurse girlfriend and she said I should contact eye emergency at St Eriks Hostpital in Stockholm. At 23:00 they told me to ring to Söder Hospital which is my local emergency. So, I drove my Cooper to work in Farsta quite early and ran off to the bus for the centrum where i then got the tube to skanstull. I was admitted to the eye dept and was seen quite quickly.
26th July 2010 08:30
A nurse took me for a quick check of my eye pressures which were ok. I touched my nose from each side…ok…eyes closed…ok….move them around..ok. Then i told her the problem and she said the dr would check more.
After the dr had looked with blinding light at me she sent me for a new check where i would look with each eye individually. They gave me a button to press when i could see the small flashes that popped up on the screen. After that was done, and me knowing i had missed everyone in the upper right region she looked in my eyes again with special drops so she could see further back.
She looked at me and said that she suspected i had had a mild stroke by my optical nerve system that transports the light to the back of the head. She gave me a admittance paper to the medical emergency dept and off i went, outside the building, to enter the emergency dept and queue again.
It went quite quicklly and i saw a dr who told me, while drawing my eyes on the paper lining the bed i was sitting on that it could be a vessel that has burst or it could be a tumour under the “roundabout” that eye channels take to the back of the brain. He didn’t think so in this case but i would now have a brain xray inclu taking a contrast injection for the last part of the x-ray.
When done the dr called me back and told me that i had a primary brain tumour at the side of my eye central and it was the water on the tumour that was causing the upper right side sight problem, which is effecting both eyes if i haven’t said before.
So, with that bomdshell, I rang my GF and she came very quickly and they moved me up to the ward for further treatment. I had known from the eye dr that i was now banned from driving for at least 1½ months and she would be kind and not report this yet to the auth so my license would not be taken. Now i have to take cortison, 18 dissolve tabs twice a day, reduces every two days by two tabs for at least 2 weeks, to take away the water so my eyesight returns again. My GF drove my loving Cooper home without any hassle and parked it in the underground carpark by my flat, locked away. Now i know im going to have an MRI on wednesday.
27th July 2010 13:00
Today they have taken my blood to test for cholesterol and it looks not bad considering i had stopped taking my simvastatin while slimming. Now im back on it for my normal cholesterol which is at 8,5 but the nasty one, triglycerides, is at 1,5 which is great! Slimming and not eating masses of crap is good. I wnt down from 82,7 kilos to 76. During the afternoon my GF was here and my ex and my 3 boys, 15, 16, he is now 17 as from 28th July, and my oldest, 21.
28th July 2010 09:00
Taken downstairs for my MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging ), which took 45 mins of laying as still as a rock. They also shot contour liquid into me again (my poor kidneys)
Just while i was going to eat my lunch i got a visit from two drs, one a neuro dr who told me they couldn’t say the tumour was primary until they had checked the rest of my body for stuff. This i had heard from the mri tech who was going to rebook the xray from today, 29th, until tomorrow. This was to spare my kidney and liver i think. The nero dr did not call the tumour for tumour…he called it cell change. And to make things a bit more shaky he said that, lthough they can see from photos to a fantastic degree if things re malignant or benign they will probably have to go in anyway. The bloody thing is at the front of the brain, to the left and they have to go a long way in. That does not feel so good actually. Ho Hum!
The day went by and then i got the news i could go home on leave for a night. Then they came back and said my x-ray would be on the 29th anyway as my kidney and liver were very good and i was healthy otherwise. So GF took me home and we could spend the evening and night together, cuddling. I hade all my tablets with me and took my sleepimg one as usual as the cortison speeds you up.
29th July 2010 08:00
I had to be back on the ward by 08:30 to take my special drink of almost one litre before being taken down, again, to the same machine as on monday. Here i was injected again with contrast fluid and they took photos of my lower region for 10 mins. Now I have to drink a lot of fluid to help my kidneys.
I’ve just eaten fish soup and pancakes and strawberry jam for lunch…..and lots of water. Now im waiting for my ex wife-in-law to come and see me with some good cd books that i can load upto my iphone and rest my eyes and lsiten to stories.
The Neuro team at Karolinska meet today to look at everyones pics. They will decide what is what and i’ll maybe get to know the score today. Then i’ll probably have to move to Karolinska Institute at Solna, just in the north part of Stockholm.
29nd 13:25
Just a bit more. Nothing wrong with my lower parts. Will probably get leave from tomorrow. The Neuro team have lots of patients to check so i might not be among them today, so next meet is on Monday. HoHum! Have spent the evening loading up lots of Hasse & Tagge cd's to my IPHONE, so now I can botanise in the vast selection of comedy from these two classic Swedish comedians and they troup of members on stage. Have also looked at an episode of The Sweeney, one from the entire collection I bought from HMV online. Have also got Kungfu with me too, if I have the effort to watch.
30th July 2010 05:28
Despite a sleeping pill, which knocked me, I woke up to the patient opposite me nose sniffing and the nurse visiting the one in the outer corner of my four bed room. So up I got, had a fresh shower, weighed myself (75,5 kilos) and am trying to open up the CD with all my x-ray pictures, which cost 120 kr. Of course you see on the cover that its not supported for Windows 7, only NT4, 2000 Prof or XP! So I’ll have to wait until later on if they let me go home for the weekend. My home made power pc has good ‘ol XP Prof that works better than W7. Sodding version!!!
Oh, thank goodness they've turned off the room alert alarms! They seem to be oblivious of them when they work nights here. Very disturbing for your sleep. Now I've been awake since 4 am
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